The day I was married was one of the happiest days of my life. To me the day was enveloped in complete bliss. As I look back on it I just remember feeling pure joy and contentment, knowing that I was blending my life with the man of my dreams.
The other day I was discussing weddings with a young lady and I mentioned how young and inexperienced I was with regard to planning my wedding. Now that I work in the wedding industry I know so much more than I did then. So I gave her a few tips regarding things I wish I had known and that I would change if I were to plan it today.
I thought that I would share with you what I’ve learned about weddings and, more importantly, myself.
If I were to plan my wedding today, I would…
…free myself from “the norm”
First and foremost. This is the biggest point I’ll make because most of my other points can fall under it in some way. Many things that I planned, I did because that’s what everybody else did. It never even occurred to me to change things up. But just because something is “normal” doesn’t necessarily mean it’s right.
In the area where I was married it is a big thing to do “the line.” I have come to realize that I
don’t really like hate the line. It’s strange. It’s awkward. It sucks up the whole evening. I would much rather just mingle, taking my time to personally go around and meet with each guest. And, even better, dance! I LOVE dancing! To me, it’s a great way to spend time with those who came while really celebrating our marriage. Because that’s what we’re all there for anyway, right?
…practice my hairstyle
Yes, I had heard this. That wedding magazine I had looked at mentioned picking your hairstyle and practicing it with your hairstylist beforehand to make sure it’s just right. At the time I thought it was superfluous.
Trust me. It isn’t.
For my special day I picked out a hairstyle I loved. I showed up at the hairstylist (whom I had never met) and showed her my picture. And guess what. She couldn’t do it. Time ticked away as she attempted to get it right, but before long we had to scrap the idea and go with a very basic hairstyle. I didn’t hate it, but I definitely didn’t love it.
I’m going to admit something here that all photographers hate. All I was worried about for my wedding was budget. Who would get it done the cheapest?
I still cringe when I think about how naive I was.
I loved my photographer as a person. She was super nice and we had a lot of fun working with her. When I look back on my photos I love the memories that were captured and I can recall exactly how I felt at each moment of the day.
But I don’t love the photography itself.
It’s simply not my style. Did you know that photographers all have different styles? I didn’t. Back then, I thought simply snapping a photo was good enough. And while I still understand that budgets are important (let’s be honest, you can’t spend more than you can afford) I would splurge just a little more and find someone who’s work I completely adore. Out of everything I spent money on, photography is the one thing that has lasted the longest.
…have a first look
The Hubster and I were married in the Idaho Falls LDS temple. LDS weddings are not typical, there is no walking down the aisle moment. In fact, the first time I saw my soon-to-be-hubby on the wedding day, we were in the foyer. We met right inside and did paperwork before going to get ready for the actual wedding.
Not exactly the fairy-tale romantic moment I had dreamed of all those years.
Today, I would TOTALLY do a first look. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.
Radiant Photography recently wrote an excellent article on what a first look (or reveal moment) is all about. I highly suggest reading it!
…add personal touches
For our wedding reception we selected refreshments from a list, which I felt was personalizing the wedding to our tastes. But our wedding day showed very little of who we were as a couple.
My husband loves electronics and video games. Why didn’t we add an Xbox station for guests to play?
I love dancing. Why didn’t we do more of it?
As a couple we are fun and lighthearted. Why didn’t we find a way to incorporate that somehow?
I see a wedding as a time to truly celebrate as a couple, so I would make sure it is unique and tailored to who we are and what we love.
I will never regret my wedding day. The most important thing is the marriage itself. The joining of two individuals into one is a special thing all on it’s own. I do, however, hope that by opening up about things that could have made our day even more special, I can give others a little perspective regarding their own future wedding.